Lilith (X)

“and what should it smell like here?? …. You mean this?” – he removed the air freshener from the ventilation grille and let she smell it.

“Is that what you mean?” He asked. “It’s my colleague’s product. They make a living by developing new perfumes… they don’t smell bad, do they? His intention was to be cologne, with cannabis extract… I think the variety is called Desfrán … it’s a strange fruity sweet with citrus tones and with a hint of cannabis… it’s fresh… ”he smiled at her.

She didn’t seem surprised – she was surprised, she was convinced she had a Royal flash.

“The important thing in that car – that’s this” – and bundles of bills peeked out of the compartment under the armrest. Definitely a hundred thousand dollars – maybe more. Bens, Bens, Bens….

“Not the money, but under them” – he gradually pulled out all the bundles of banknotes and pulled a small plastic bag from the bottom of the compartment. The one used by dealers…. And there were a few fish scales in the bag.

“That was the most important thing in that car… These fish scales’ bring me luck.”

“You’re weird” – she still stared at the bundles of bills in disbelief. They would suit her for a new beginning.

“Why? Money has no lasting value – only immediate – there are places where you can’t buy anything for it. “

“But you can’t buy anything for fish scales either'”

“Sure” but money doesn’t bring happiness. ” at least not for me. The money is yours.

“And what category is this surprise from? Good … bad? ”

“I can’t take it … it’s not possible. It’s a pile of money, “she said.

“Have you ever seen a pile of money?” he asked her.

“Yup now.”
“I mean a real pile of money – I saw a very big pile. Several piles… and none stood no one happy. But I also saw a lot of luck with a few scales. “

Fairy tales… fairy tales – she repeated in her mind.

“Maybe not.” He replied to her thoughts. “That’s why I offer you to take them – maybe you will get what you really need for them – rent an apartment, buy equipment, whatever it will be enough for. Maybe in a year we can meet and tell me how much happiness they brought, okay? ”

“I can’t – not that they won’t help me now – but I just can’t.” – she didn’t even notice what he was reacting to.

“Well, if that’s not possible, I’ll have to leave with your pile of money now,” and that will bother me. Believe… I can’t keep them now… ”
“ What do you want for it?? Sex? Aren’t you a pervert? …. Or something? ”She looked at him a second time anxiously.

“You watch movies a lot,” he laughed. “Life is not a comic.”

“So what’s the point?”

“You already deserved them. I paid for a lesson in reality… and for that momentary feeling of happiness it was worth … “

“What if I don’t come anywhere in a year?”

“Then I’ll hope you’re okay.”

“You’re weird – aren’t you?”

“Everyone is like you.”

“I don’t believe you want anything …”

“So if you want, you can make me your couscous.”

“It won’t be right away, but – I have to get housing, work first”

“I thought you had a plan – that you were just moving – not that you ‘re on the escape -“

“I do not want to talk about it…”

“Respect… but in that case they will be more than useful to you…”

“I can’t … I don’t want to learn to be grateful,” committed “

“Are you grateful to your employer when you get paid?”

“It’s just too much.”

“They just used to pay little…maybe ‘”

“So you’re saying they’re” okay … I’ll put them in my bag now and I’ll go “and you won’t do anything – Do I understand correctly?”


“As you wish…” – she walked around the car and sat in the passenger seat. She put the bag on her lap, unzipped it, and began stacking bundles of money. She watched him to see if he was doing anything, but she didn’t see him head-standing, too close to the car. She could only see him pull a lighter out of his pocket.

He set it on fire. He saw her unzip the bag and bundle by bundle disappeared inside her. In the bag, he saw only quality hi-fi headphones and a Ferrero Rocher package. He leaned over to see the compartment in his door. His Ferrero Rocher package was not there. Everything is as it should be.

So done. She fastened her bag and didn’t know what to do next – she didn’t feel happy. The guy’s right… what kind of guy is he? – She thought. She didn’t want to get out of the car.

“Do you want to throw somewhere?” He bent down and peered into the car.

“What’s the matter with you? … Are you not feeling well??” he asked cautiously. “You are very pale”

“I’m hungry and I don’t know what to do … now.”

“I’m sure I know what to do with the first” when we solve the first, let’s try the second “

He closed the driver’s door and walked around the car to her side. Before he walked around him, she slammed the door on her side and tried to lock it. She panicked.

He shook his head, dropped his cigarette, opened the back door, and sat behind her.

“Is anything wrong?”

She was silent. She just leaned back in her seat. The adrenaline level she woke up with in the morning was just showing a free fall.

“Hello … Is something wrong?

“I don’t know … doesn’t happen to you?”
He realized the car smelled different. He still held a cannabis freshener in his hand.
“I’ll just put the freshener back on the grille, don’t worry” – he leaned over the seats and returned it to the grille. She smelled. Iris, tangerine, rose… beautiful scent. “Or not. I’ll put him back in the door. You smell so much better. You have a taste… You smell beautiful. ”
“ Do you like it? ”
“ I don’t know… it smells nice. So, are we going to lunch? Maybe you’re just hungry for it – you probably have enough today, don’t you? “

“Can I leave a bag here?”

“Of course..”

Lilith (IX)

She was guided to the center by navigation. She drove through the square and parked in one of the adjacent streets. Seamlessly. There was more than enough space everywhere. Alone in a foreign city.

She didn’t want to do anything until she returned the car to the owner. He didn’t call, which was weird. She wasted her time looking at shop windows with useless things. Uselessness can beautify new places perfectly.

She had a taste right now

get something. Some trifle. Something to remind her of this day. Picture? Cup? A mug is not a bad idea. I can make tea in it in the morning… In addition, the glass in which she made tea until yesterday was for shards… and shards in a basket… and a basket in Eden.

Shouldn’t I call him? Tell him where his car is? Yeah. I’ll call him where the car is and leave the keys in the car. She pulled a phone from her pocket.

Whore. In the call history, the call with him was an unknown number. Maybe he’ll call himself. He will definitely call. She had to – her head was racing.

“I think you have the keys to my car” – she said from behind her. She had time to put on an unperturbed expression.

“Aren’t you happy?” “It wasn’t safe.” “Now it’s up to you again” – she handed him the car key.
“That’s enough today.”
“I guess so … have you figured out where your couscous is cooking here?” “I’ve been here for a while … I didn’t have that big lead again. And couscous doesn’t cook, it’s getting ready …” – she instructed him.

“Where is the car?”

“In one of those alleys to the square,” I’d say there, “she said, pointing to her chin.

“I thought you could track your car.”

“If I have a charged phone, then ..”

“That’s why…” she understood.

“You’re going to show me where you left him – just in case.”

“Don’t you believe me?”

“I’ve done that once before.”

“You owe me …”

“For what?”

“For parking.” five bucks… have that half an hour for a dollar .. ”

“Shall we settle for the car? Consent?”

“All right – I’m kidding – I’m glad I got here so fast. It was fun…”

“Well, how for whom.”

“Did you feel helpless? At the wall?”


“A car stuffed with cannabis, or magic.” you can’t call the cops… stupid situation… it was careless of you .. “

“From me? You’ll see for yourself that I could call them right away. You just showed me my weaknesses. You scored in that. Your game was fun. But there’s something in that car that I really don’t want to lose. I’ll show you something at the car “- he laughed. She probably didn’t find it…

“And I’ll go to lunch here – if you don’t refuse,” he said as they passed the hotel restaurant.

“Maybe they have your goodness on offer”

“Maybe not…”

“So if you want to find out, I’ll invite you.” I ate last time yesterday morning and I will definitely go to lunch … “

EXCity is a magical place full of useless things, full of shop windows of useless things differing only in material, shape or color. They passed crowded shop windows. Baubles, whores, casinos… everything for residents and visitors of eX.

On the opposite side he saw a florist – I still have to buy those lilies – he realized.

“You see – he’s standing there,” she interrupted the flow of his thoughts.

“I’ll just see if everything is as it should be – and you’ll probably be surprised.”

“Surprise is never enough.” But only the pleasant ones “

“… and can you distinguish them from each other? Pleasant from unpleasant? ”

“Stupid question – Pleasant is pleasant to me and unpleasant is unpleasant – It’s easy –

“Or selfish … I think everything has a way of being pleasant …”

He opened the car… “Do you see anything illegal somewhere?”

She peeked into the car again. Yeah, it has to be here… “Can’t you smell it?”

Pull process …

Another popular process I use for analog black and white photography is the “Pull process“. Just set the sensitivity of the exposure meter to lower than the actual film sensitivity. The exposure then runs a little longer. I will leave the negative in the developer only half the time. Even the cheapest negative creates a very fine grain and a whole range of halftones.

Canon EOS 500N, 50mm,Ilford HP5 Plus 400(drop to 100), developing 4,5 min (Kodak professional)

© Mic . All photos are my own.
No usage allowed in any form without my written consent.

time for maintenance …

The weather really doesn’t want to be photographed outside for a few weeks in a row. Therefore, it is not harmful to carry out preventive maintenance of cameras, lenses and flashes from time to time. Especially older devices like to stop working properly in the winter. And because I really like to take photos of old devices, there is enough work.

If you are a skilled individual, doing deeper maintenance on a manual lens is not a problem.If you do not have a technical lens drawing, take a picture of each step. For new lenses, do not perform such maintenance without experience.

Do the same when disassembling and assembling the cameras. The photos from the mobile phone will then tell you where the part belongs.

I was a tree …

I died of old age, succumbed to disease, I was planted, even uprooted, I succumbed to disasters, I was often defeated, but you a man, full of pride, you are never have not won over me. You need me. But I don’t need You…. Sincerely Your Tree.

I was a tree and I’ll be here again when you’re gone…

© Mic . All photos are my own.
No usage allowed in any form without my written consent.

Lilith (VIII)

“You don’t even know how happy you are.”

“Why do you think I don’t know … don’t underestimate … your words too …”

“Just words … like the Navajo code … you never know who’s listening to you … watching … you’re always interested in someone.”

“Big brother?” “Brother, sister, anyone … analyzers. But only a few people can translate it … they’re on the same page … Imagine you only have a few words to describe everything in the world.”

“Something like Apollo 13? Do you have this and do we need to make this?”

“Like … you just have to be able to make absolutely everything … absolutely everything, just what you have at your disposal. The evolution of experience.”

“For example?”

“Maybe I can only use words like Joker and piano …”

“I don’t understand”

“Well, you see – there are people who understand – they know exactly what I’m saying.”

“So what is it in your language?”


“So you need to say fantasies, you say Joker and piano … right?”


“So you probably already know why so many people don’t have fun with you …”

“I know – I don’t mind – sometimes.”

“Does it bother you or not?”

“It’s just a tax”

“Any coded phrase again?”

“No. Why? ”
“ Just like that… You and the tax sound the same as the Joker and the piano. ”
“ Well, you see, you’ve just created your own language. ”
“ I’ll stay with mine. “

“It’ll stay in your brain forever anyway … believe me… “

” And what does it mean … we’re going to eX for couscous? “
“You wouldn’t understand … and I really don’t underestimate you.”
“Dude, maybe for You, I’ll buy couscous too … I like it … I watch you get drunk, but I feel drunk.”

“I’m not drunk”

“I didn’t say that”

“And it doesn’t matter if you think it!”

“I’d rather not think about anything anymore – as if you ever read your mind.”

“..You overestimate.”

“No – I just don’t underestimate.”

“Only variations and combinations of probabilities of possible… Do you know how many slaps cost one caress?”

“Dude, a lot?”

“More than a lot… so much that you think you can’t take another…”

“Well, I don’t care about such a caress.”

“It’s not about reward at all.” It’s about the journey. “

“Oh my God, let’s be there.” Finally eX “- George almost shouted with relief –

“..Is a moment and I’m going out of my mind about you.”

“Maybe you lost him a long time ago …”

Certainly not me, George thought.

“Are you sure about that?”

“Go to …. Where now?”

“Here, for example. You go back. ‘I’ll take a walk.’ I still don’t know where couscous is sold here. “

“I don’t have to understand everything – not really. Should I pick you up somewhere then? ”

“I’ll let you know if I know.”

“I’m throwing you downtown.”

“Okay. I’ll leave you the rest of Jack … and borrow an iron from you … “

“Do you go to couscous with iron? Don’t you have yours? ”

“I have … with six’s. More arguments may be needed. “

“Do you want to help?”

“No … maybe I want to enjoy it.”

“Be careful.” Desert Eagl makes realy big couscous of everything. And you can’t play your Russian roulette… dude. ”

George stopped just behind the police car. The proverb about the lamp and the darkness is verified. A thousand times.

“All right – and if nothing.”

“As always,” I’ll burn like a holy picture in my hands. “

He got out of the car and headed past the police car to the department store. They didn’t even look up from their cell phones. There will be a gray mouse among humans. He turned on the phone and it beeped goodbye three times. And it is done. BF is God knows where and nothing has been agreed upon. He scanned the square quickly to see if he could see his car.

Lilith (VII)

He stopped at the curb without a word.

“Thank you – you helped me a lot – you have it with me” – she smiled again.

“Rather not.”

“Thank you,” she winked at him.

“Thank you too,” the sloth beeped

She ran to the barriers. She looked around and ran to the car. She gave the thirsty car a drink.

“You have to endure this for a while when your boss a greedy man,” she said to the vehicle. She left the empty canister on the road. It took a while for the pump to deliver fuel to the nozzles. The engine caught for the third time. And go..go. She could afford to go fast. Less than two gallons to the eXcity will suffice. She push on the music player. He said he listened to everything. So let’s see what else. She watched the traffic on the road. Wow .. are you listening to this too? She listed the song and

press playback… .Haciendo el amor a la misma que tu teca, Bebe no te pasa… Singing with her.


The battery is almost empty – he read on the display. Damn.

“What is the day today?”

“Tuesday – why?”

“Ah, that’s how it fits” – just a classic Tuesday – I just shouldn’t even turn on the microwave on Tuesdays.

“Do you have a charger?”

„?? Martina? You know her. Why?”

“Phone charger – moron, you’re incredible”

“Joke. It’s in the compartment in front of you… ”- George had fun at his expense.

He opened the partition. Desert eagle. Gun magazines. 0.50 AE IMI. No charger.

“You don’t have… just a pile of iron .”

“There must be …”

“So I’m probably blind.” wait, she’s here… you have a mess like a woman in a handbag. I hope it works. “

“She should – if you have the right connector”

“I can see it all wrong now. We’ll be at the gas station in a minute. I’ll try to get the right cable “

“Take my phone.”

“I can’t keep track of what I want to watch on your phone” – he wondered if he should announce that the nice girl had left him with the car. He doesn’t have to know everything. I would then listen to that for the rest of my life – he rejected the idea.

“Did you see the canister?”


“The canister on the road… looked forgotten”

“When you see a phone charger lying on the road, I’ll be interested – I don’t care about the canister.”

Georg drove into the parking lot.

“I’ll be right back” – he realized that he had said this sentence once before, and it wasn’t fast enough.

“Don’t go anywhere … wait for me.”

“Sure … I’ll wait until the door closes behind you and I’ll go to eXCity quickly to buy you all the couscous”

“Dude, don’t even move”

He just walked into the store, called the attendant – Hello – do you have phone chargers? “

“We’re a little gas station, I don’t think this will be here,” said the girl with the Shell headdress, “You’ll have to go to the citiy.”

“Okay, at least I’ll take this” – he grabbed Jack’s bottle, paid, got back in the car.

“Decent – I don’t think they had a charger,” George commented.

“They haven’t. Go!”

He unscrewed the cap and a good quarter of the bottle was gone. He looked at the phone. The battery indicator showed uncompromisingly that there was no point in wanting Bixby.

“Yeah, that’s why you need a driver today – Jack,” George laughed

“The devil knows what I need – I don’t know, but thanks for coming right away”

“Is something eating you?”

“I wouldn’t say that – I just forgot to have fun, to enjoy … I guess. There is less and less to enjoy. “

“Do you remember your words?”

“My words? … I’ve screwed up too much in my life to guess which one…”

“You really only enjoy your own death.”

“There are a lot of things that you can’t achieve in life, a lot of things will pass you by, even those you almost reached for – so why not enjoy what you will definitely achieve, enjoy something that you will not miss. “
” A lesson of philosophy – A lot of people are yours bullshit is fun and scary at the same time – I’m not sure how many times you mean it either “
” Only fantasies – people are scared only by their own construction of things – I have a negligible role in that. “
” Will you tell them? “
” Why? … Why? stealing fantasy? I’m just trying to wake up the imagination… “

” I’m completely impressed … when I see you with Jack “- George chuckled.

Lilith (VI)

George stared blankly at A – “What the fuck are you talking about that grain?”

He covered the phone with his hand and shouted to his friend – “Geoegi, if you keep quiet all the way, you have a box of vodka with me.”

“Are you there?” He asked the phone. Silence. Hush. No answer…

“George,speed up.”

“That’s well,” George said, stepping on the gas with satisfaction.

“Hi Bixby search car …” – he didn’t even wait for the application to start … he turned off the phone and hid it in his pocket. He looked at the “recipe” with scribbled flowers.


She bluffed. It wasn’t even a minute before she walked to the gas station. She was in sight. Maybe not a mile.

She waved at a passing car. Unsympathetic guy with a sloth visage with hairy hands.

“I just need a gas station here.” drought in the tank. “

“Sit down.”

“I’m driving short time… I thought it would work. But you see, it didn’t work out. ”She tried to speak so as not to leave room for questions.

“Still, it’s nice … thank you, you’re nice” – good for pretty girls. Then they can, go crazy with willingness, she thought.

“I refueled in the morning, so if want to throw you back at the car?” There is a exit on the highway in the opposite direction… “- he offered.

“That would be a great thank you. I’ll be right back. “

They sell a canister at every gas station. Canisters for those who thought it be all ok.

“Would you like some coffee?” The cashier asked her.

“Thank you, I’m in a hurry – I’ll refuel in it, I’ll take for a five bucks”

She reached the stand. She slipped the credit card into the reader. Gasoline or diesel? Damn. What is his car going for? There is no time…

… .. I always take gasoline accurately – she heard his voice in her head. Uf… he said everything about himself. She refueled too. One and a half gallons. She didn’t keep the little one in the spirit of the staff. She was in a hurry.

“Then we can go if you’ll so kind” – and she put on the kindest smile from category 1.

“Yes, we’ll be right there,” their hairy hands said.

How much time could I lose? Maximum 10 minutes – she counted. She had no idea if she had a head start. But when he called me, he shouted at someone – he was probably already sitting in the car – so there’s not much time.

“Stop me here – I climb the barrier.”

“It’s just a short walk to the next exit.”


She looked like an ordinary girl with a gun in her hand. And she wasn’t smiling. Certainly not.

He stopped at the curb without a word.

Lilith (V)

He pulled a phone from his pocket. “Hi my car” waited for the GPS tracking application to start. Fine… she goes in the direction of eXCity. At least.

“Hi BF”. He listened to the ringing tone, longer than he was used to.

“Hello sir” – BF said.

“Hi man, minor complications on the way – I’ll be there a little later”

“Some trouble?!

“No, nothing worth talking about. I just got a taste for couscous, so I’ll stay shopping…. “

“Couscous? … Dude, you’re starting to scare me – is this a new trend now?”

“Keep calm. Delay 30 minutes… hour at most.


“I’ll be in touch, bye.”

He took out a cigarette and lit it.

“Hi Bixby… call George” – the second side picked up the call almost immediately

“I’m listening”

“Saddle the horses and pick me up at the 76th exit on eXCity. Now.”

“OK. Give me 15 minutes … where are we going? ”

“Somewhere for couscous.”

“What? …” – he could imagine his expression – “..I’ll be there in a moment.”

“OK. I’ll wait. “

He hid the phone, leaned against the 76th building, and looked like a poker player. The player who announced the draw. He wondered if he had missed something – except that he underestimated it again. Somehow it was, somehow it will be. Are there any days when nothing abnormal happens?

George arrived with his second cigarette. He stopped right next to him. He crushed a cigarette on the peeling Happy Journey sign and got in the car.

” Where it will be?”

“If you have a full tank, then eXCity. If not, back to the stand. “

“Everything is as it should be.”

“Let’s go, calm down and buy a tree in the car. It stinks like a russian bus with vodka. “

“They have better couscous at eXCity than here?” George did not forgive the question. “That was a joke, wasn’t it?”

“I can’t tell jokes and that’s why I don’t tell them…”

“OK – we’ll go for couscous” when the cops stop us, I can tell them … gentlemens, I’m sorry for the fast ride, but we’re in a hurry – we’re going for couscous … this gentleman is dependent on him. Then they let me breathe… and they’ll do a drug test on you… .. ”

“I didn’t say we were in a hurry – just to take me away”

“You’re in a great mood!”

“I am in a great mood. I just can’t look like that

like a monkey… or God knows what kind you are. ”

“Then we will go like two decent gentlemen.” That will look perfectly normal, ”said George sarcastically. It will be fun again.

“Let’s go before six at eXCity at the latest.”

“Are they closing up a health food store at six?”

“At six, monkeys like you close … turn on the radio and drive,” and open the window. You stink like a moonshiner. ”

He picked up the phone. “Bixby? Search car… I’ll see if we’re going right “- he said rather to himself. She kept the right direction…. he kept watching her on the screen. It was more interesting than listening to George. He remembered the recipe. He reached into his pocket. He put the phone in his lap and opened a folded piece of paper with a recipe for the most expensive couscous in his life. He stared at him blankly for a moment… he picked up the phone again and typed in the phone number that was written on the ticket…

The phone rang for a moment….

“Please,” a woman’s voice said.

“What if I didn’t open the recipe?”

“So you would just an ordinary guy with a gun..”

“You would run out of fuel while driving quietly to the next gas station, but you drove faster. According to GPS, you’re about 30 miles ahead of Shell … you’ll have to walk a short distance … I always get gasoline exactly… “

“It works … I’m half lighter than you.”

Not stupid, he had to admit.

“Besides, I think you’re glad you don’t drive… Am I wrong? That’s not how Ambi Pur smells … is it? I’m sure you didn’t call the cops. “

“So the score is two …”

“Come on … it’s not a race … it’s just a service in return … you wanted to take me safely … you ripped the thorn off my heel … in return I would take the car where it was needed. “

“I invite you to couscous”

“Do you try to get off me by couscous? ” she laughed.

Lilith (IV)

The silence in the car, disturbed only by the muffled music and the noise of the tires. As she carefully selected the ingredients of the recipe, he stared motionlessly in front of him. He wondered when was the last time he exchanged so many sentences with someone. Year? Last time… but it doesn’t matter. Now or before. It’s not bad to talk here and there. Especially not to cry nonsense. Keep the conversation in this tone. She shouldn’t have seen the weapon – that’s a mistake. It will be a clue in her memory. He didn’t care for anyone to remember him for too long. It’s too long it’s too long. And most importantly not to… do not spoil her imagination. Make the most of her consciousness like a gray mouse. She will meet a lot of them in her life, so one mouse more or one mouse less….

“That’s it, I hope you enjoy it. It takes longer to write than to prepare “- she grinned at his back and handed him the described torn sheet from the recipe block.

“Thank you – I’ll really try it” – he picked up the ticket, folded it between his fingers and tucked it in his breast pocket.

“There will be a gas station in a moment, so I’ll stop again”

“Sure, I’m just a passenger – if you want to stop.”

Should I stop if I want to? What did she mean? Probably as she said… nothing more, nothing less. Don’t think about it.

“You can bounce or light it. I’ll only buy cigarettes and chewing gum”.

“OK – I’ll stay in the car”

He drove into the parking lot behind the gas station building and turned off the engine.

“I’ll be right back”

“I’m fine I’m not in a hurry”

He got out of the car and headed for the market.

She sat motionless for a moment, looking around the interior. Really nothing to see, the radio could let play…. In the compartment of his door, she saw a package of Ferrero Rocher and a few crumpled cigarette boxes. He left the keys in the ignition. She got an idea….

He left the market and unwrapped cellophane on a pack of cigarettes. He hated this useless piece of packaging. He headed for the parking lot. The car he arrived in didn’t stand there. He looked around to make sure there was no other parking lot with his car. It’s not. He realized it slowly. He laughed. Today’s second mistake… pretty. Pretty expensive recipe. Girl, if that couscous isn’t to be eaten, you have a problem.

“So, sir, and now we’ll find out how ordinary you are,” she said amusedly behind the wheel of a moving car.